Ahh, what would I do without the daily Shanghai headlines that amuse and confuse????  Every day, I read the Shanghai Daily and it never fails to make me shake my head in wonder.  Here’s just a few of today’s stories:

“Plane circles as controllers sleep on job”. These fine employees “broke the rules by sleeping” on the job–YOU THINK???  This particular China Eastern flight just circled and waited for someone to wake up so they could land safely.  HELLO!!!  THIS IS YOUR WAKE UP CALL!!  Now these napping controllers face “disciplinary action”– just a piece of advice–please fire them before I fly again.

“Shop pulls pasta as ‘mac & fleas’ fails to impress” Warning–Don’t read this article at dinner time.  Seems a local store in Gubei had to withdraw Pasta delLevante branded items that were housing bugs.  Two for one special–bugs AND pasta.  You get your protein and your grains in one bag all for one low, low price.  What a deal!

“‘Leftover’ men buy brides from Vietnam”.   In a country with over a billion people, there seems to be a shortage of available women so rural gents are making deals to bring over Vietnamese women looking for their Prince Charming.  Of course, cash is involved for these heartwarming couplings.  The Chinese women often come with high demands from the parents–a car and house may be required for the parental blessing to be awarded.  Poor men who can’t come comply to snag a local bride are turning to the hard-working Vietnamese women looking for an easier life.  Of course, this tradition is rife with abuse and kidnappings vs. consensual wedlock.  As one “Vietnam dating” service detailed, they supply “kind and obedient” women with a guarantee if the new bride “escapes”, they will replace her for free.  Now that’s customer service at it’s human trafficking best!

“From dusk till dawn, Suzhou Creek sculpture is a no-go zone for locals”.    Locals have complained that “spooky” sculptures are giving them nightmares and that they are “freaked out” by the design.  These works of art by sculptor Yang Jinsong  were inspired by a photo of 1960’s women who were textile workers near Suzhou Creek.  It seems at night, the fading light makes them look like they have no heads.  Of course, that could also be from the local weed these people may or may not be smoking.  Who knows?  The government is contacting the artist to resolve the issue.  Don’t hold your breath for resolution.

And that is just one day’s worth of wacky headlines.  What did I learn?  Don’t take night flights or walk by the sculptures at night, and, more importantly, check the pasta to see if it is moving before buying!