Blue Hair Dreams and Orange Reality

James arrived this week to spend his school break with us in China.. As we stood at the airport eagerly awaiting his arrival, Thom turns to me and says, “There is something you should know in advance so you don’t react badly when you see him.” What. The. Hell. Another tattoo? Piercings? Both popular in the Seattle college environment, I hoped that he had at least had the good sense to get them done in a place that can be easily covered with clothes as he expects to be a lawyer one day. God Willing.

Thom smiled and shared that James’ hair was now orange as a result of a self-induced hair trauma. Yes, no hiding it unless you want to wear a hat 24/7 but hair does grow back. Sure enough, sporting a mop of wild orange curls, James emerged from Chinese Customs sheepishly grinning. Thank God I had been warned so I didn’t scream in public and embarrass my “grown up” son.

The "before" look--it was orange in the bright light.
The “before” look–it was orange in the bright light.

“Are you stupid?” After a quickly arranged visit to my stylist Michael on his first day in China, James got treated to some blunt trash talk.   He didn’t really appreciate being called stupid by a complete stranger but since Michael was holding sharp scissors close to his jugular, James was wise enough not to bitch too much. He seriously explained that he had gone online to get instructions on how to color his hair blue for an EMT concert he was going to with friends. It was on the Internet so it had to be true, right?  Right?  The first step called for him to use peroxide on his auburn curls, which promptly turned them orange so he wisely stopped the process, not knowing what a coat of blue on top of that oranginess would produce. See, he’s not SO stupid. Mama didn’t raise no fool.

The "after" look-yes, I made him smile.
The “after” look-yes, I made him smile.

Since he is 21 now and legally an adult, I should have let him keep his damaged hair, to live with the results that he wasn’t bothered by in the least. In fact I think he thought he looked pretty cool.   However, since he will be introduced to people here in China that I work with, I advised him that a redo was in order for his current hair “situation”. Grudgingly but accepting of the situation, he went along with his Mom’s direction. Thank you sweetie! Threats of not paying any more college tuition were not ideal threats at all and he realized it. See, he IS smart!

Now, he is sporting a trendy yet socially acceptable “do” that is not the color of cartoon characters and I am $100 poorer. Lessons learned? Probably not-James is also very stubborn and thinks he always knows best. Where in the HELL did he get THAT attitude? Hmmmm…..

 

Home Alone No More

After a two month journey alone working my butt off and living the solitary life, my fellow adventurer has returned home. Thom landed this week with jet lag to spare. As unhappy as I was by myself, I had grown used to it. Coming home from work to an empty, quiet house after a long day and spending my evenings at the gym, eating cereal for dinner as I read trashy novels on my Kindle was boring, boring, boring. I worked too much and had very little fun. But that was what had become normal. A bad normal but still, after two months, my new normal.

In strolls my funny, grumpy, messy, noisy, opinionated partner for life. Quiet no more. Yet, instead of being thrilled at his arrival, I was irritated at times and not appreciative like I should have been. Hell, Pink, our Ayi, was happier to see him than I was. I resented him taking up my time, not wanting to go to the gym when I did, needing to eat when I was fine with a piece of cheese and a glass of wine, talking while I was working on a project. You get it—driving me absolutely f&@#ing bat shit crazy.

At night, who was that hulk taking up my spacious bed and hogging the pillows??? My pillow was stolen while I was on a nocturnal bathroom break. Not. Funny. Finally, I went to the couch to get some rest away from this strange intruder. Waking up to him making coffee was a plus for sure and softened the transition. Going for foot massage and mani/pedi night was an entre into the life that we had known and embraced. Ahhh…nothing like a spa date to bring two people together again.

Thom getting pampered after his long journey home.
Thom getting pampered after his long journey home.

As our daily routine becomes once again filled with the happy sharing of lives, we have vowed not to ever do that living apart thing again. While there were solid reasons for having it happen, i.e. helping with the new baby, moving into our new Boise house, etc., it was NOT pretty. I’m not sure how a relationship can survive separations like this or how people survive life without a loving partner and I never want to try it. Thom, WELCOME HOME HONEY! Now, give me back my damned pillow and make us some coffee.  Love you!

 

Long Distance Nai Nai

Many of you know that I am a long distance Nai Nai with the birth of beautiful Mia to my daughter Hannah and her hubby Mike.  Thom has been with them being the supportive Gpa since her birth but now will come home to China this week.  He is already crying at the thought of not seeing them every day-yes, he is the biggest baby of them all!  I had to leave a week after her birth to come back and work, which is important to the whole family, but I cried a lot too.

To say I’m heartbroken not to be closer to assist would be an understatement.  As we were just emailing back and forth about our dream to start a business together, my little Mama is up at 3 a.m. feeding the ever hungry Mia.  Sure, I can’t help with THAT but if I was there I could come over in the morning and watch Mia so Hannah could get a much needed nap.  I am so proud of her and what a great Mom she already is and how strong she is but, oh how I wish I could help.  Until we can be together, dearest daughter and baby Mia, your Nai Nai will pray for you LOTS and work on getting our family business up and running so we can all be together in the future.  I love you.

Mama Hannah and her Mia-love so strong from the start
Mama Hannah and her Mia-love so strong from the start

Lazy Afternoon in Shanghai

Happiest discovery of the day was that “my” subway line, the #9, goes right to Tianzifang Alley, my fav place to shop.  How did I not know this before??  It’s the little things that make me happy.  Pathetic.  If you come to Shanghai, you absolutely must shop there.  Quaint and photogenic, the crowded alleyways are lined with interesting stuff.  One place even had Cronuts, the croissant/donut that is so hot in NYC right now.  Trendy!

Tianzifang Alley-always fun to visit and right on the Subway Line #9
Tianzifang Alley-always fun to visit and right on the Subway Line #9

Yes, the prices are higher than at the AP “fake” market but there is a nice mix of stores and bars/restaurants to spend the day wandering and enjoying.

My favorite stores include the t-shirt shop with all original designs where you can get a really cool T for just 99 RMB ($16 US).  Not saying who I bought that awesome t-shirt for but he arrives later this week on his school break.  Luckily, he never reads his Mom’s blog so my secret is safe.  Now, I can’t say what gift I got my Mom because she is a loyal blog supporter so we’ll just say that it’s pretty enough to wear to dinner.  I had to visit the paper store too where beautiful and witty postcards share space with ObamaMao notebooks and paper picture frames to hang from twine with adorable clothespins. The resident shop cat was missing–hope she was just in the back and not someone’s lunch.

After a short subway ride home, I saw all kinds of interesting sights on the short walk home.  Sundays are a busy day as most people only have this day off from work.  The shoe cobbler was very busy as were the fruit ladies.

Shoe Cobbler is busy on Sundays
Shoe Cobbler is busy on Sundays
Watermelons are plentiful right now!  Wished I liked them.
Watermelons are plentiful right now! Wished I liked them.

I guess it is now officially watermelon season as they were piled everywhere along the street.  Too bad I’m not a fan of this fruit.  Lychee are also hot right now.  I’ve tried them-kind of slimy so no go.  Yes, I’m a picky eater.  SO. SUE. ME.   I’m an apple, pineapple and banana kind of girl with a kiwi now and then to spice things up.

The DVD store was busy too-tried to buy the new XMen movie but my guy there clued me in that it was a “bad” copy (he only does this for the regulars–the tourists go back to their home country with crap DVD’s) so I opted for the first two seasons of Orange is the New Black, which I hear is very good.  I predict the family will have a movie marathon on a rainy day soon.  Off to Beijing tomorrow–never a dull moment!

Sundays are laundry day and clothes are hung randomly all over the sidewalks to dry.
Sundays are laundry day and clothes are hung randomly all over the sidewalks to dry.
Umbrella anyone?  Locals use for shade from the sun.
Umbrella anyone? Locals use for shade from the sun.

Dining in the sky anyone? Only in Shanghai!

 

High Tea

High Tea for Everyone

Is this crazy or what???  I actually saw this happening on Friday when I was at a business lunch a few blocks away.  At first, we thought it was workers being lifted to a construction site but then, they stayed in the same place, hoisted above the city, for quite awhile.  Then, I see this article on the front page of the Shanghai Daily explaining that this is just a restaurant stunt and a very over the top way to show your status by dining in the sky.  Three courses for lunch, no less!  And you just know that they were drinking the whole time.  I can only imagine the tipsy patrons after the next stunt–a seven course wine dinner.  Perhaps the restaurant will provide not only food and alcohol but nets and bouncy mattresses on the ground below to catch the guests if they tip over.   This is just nuts–eating and drinking while hoisted by a crane with no doubt limited safety features.  When in China!  Only in China!

 

Evening Stroll in Shanghai

The culture here, especially in warmer months, is to enjoy the outdoors and stroll with friends, family and pets.  I’m all about walking and having adventures so I embraced this tradition and took a walk last night along the Huangpu River in Pudong near our apartment.  It was hot and humid with the AQI in the 160+ “Unhealthy” range, which in Shanghai means a lovely evening, so everyone was out enjoying themselves.  Without Thom, it’s not as much fun but he will be home soon, so in the meantime, I had to get out and enjoy some unhealthy air all by my lonesome.  So, off to the river walk I went with an end destination to pick up some healthy salad at Fresh Elements and take home to eat while I watch Veep, Season Three, purchased at the local DVD store.

Basketball is big here in Shanghai!
Basketball is big here in Shanghai!

Walking by the courts along the river, it’s easy to see that basketball is big here as there are usually always several games going on.  I have never seen girls playing basketball so I wonder if that is done here.  The only sports that I have heard that local girls play is tennis and badminton.  Sports in general are not really a way of life though watching the World Cup is definitely HUGE here–probably because it involves drinking and partying as well plus I’m starting to see articles about the gambling that is going on with people betting on the games.  Now, that is definitely a huge sport here with people going to Macau to “make money” not like Vegas where going to shows and entertainment is a part of the total experience.  I’m told that they take gambling very seriously here.

Going further down the river walk, I happened upon what looked like an organized ritual going on.  There were probably 20 people, including a monk, chanting specific wording off laminated cards.  Facing the water and solemnly reading the words over containers filled with live eels,  I wished I could understand Mandarin well enough to know what the hell was going on.  It was definitely a “Shanghai moment” and I’m so glad I was there to experience it.  

Even though I’m alone right now, I force myself to get out and see this wonderful, unique country while I can.  I don’t know how long we will be here and I want to soak it all in while I can.  Looking forward to my son, James, coming this week so we can go on adventures with him.  He came at Christmas but the weather wasn’t as accommodating to get out so hopefully he brings his walking shoes because instead of playing Xbox and ordering from Sherpa’s as he loves to do, we are going to wander and explore China while he is here-just what 21 year olds like to do with their parents!

News So Crazy It Has To Be Real-Who Could Make This Up???

The news made it’s usual trip to crazy town this week in the “Around China” section of the local newspaper so I thought I would share with you this collection of news briefs that showcase the absurdity of human behavior:

“Big rooftop house measures 1,630 sq m”.  So this illegal house was “discovered” recently though it was erected between 12/2012 and 4/2013.  Was it under an invisibility cloak all this time?  Did it just fall out of the sky on top of the building when no one was looking?  In typical fashion, “Local urban management officials could not stop the project because they didn’t meet with the owner, though they attempted to.”  Not surprisingly, the owner “cannot be found” but the house remains as testament to the craziness of the housing industry here.  Anyone need a room with a view?  Anyone want to bet that the urban management officials have moved in until the owner returns to keep it safe?

“Wife seeks divorce from blabbermouth husband.”. Yes, that’s a quote.  Seems the hubster was sharing details about their sex life with his parents. Now, men here are very attached to their family and all but this is a little too much sharing.  The court supported the woman’s request based on her plea that there was “no understanding between them and they had a poor emotional foundation.”  You think?

“Man drinks own urine for ‘treatment’ for 24 years.” This retired “official” (inquiring minds wonder what he was officially In charge of?) has now been diagnosed with kidney failure at age 88.  He said he “felt good for first 20 years” but now, not so much.  “Experts said there is no scientific basis to believe that drinking urine improves health.” Now, there’s some good news.

And finally, don’t come rushing to visit me to get your surgery done when you read this one:

“3-D printing used in surgery for first time.”. A hospital in a province that shall not be named has become the first to “experiment” with 3-D printing technology in vascular surgery.  Yes, Doctor, please experiment on me too and print me out a new heart or hip.   So cool.  Let’s see if it works after you cut me open.  Beautiful.  I bet they could work you in to the surgery schedule too if you ask nice.

 

It’s Human Eat Dog Festival Time

The headline in the Shanghai Daily reads, “Early dinner for lovers of dog meat”.  NOT. KIDDING.  It seems that there is an annual summer solstice festival in Yulin City in southern China where residents gather to eat dog meat and lychee in celebration of the longest day of the year.  This is so wrong on so many levels that I can’t stand it!  We didn’t bring our beloved Izaak to China with us because it was very difficult and a long hard journey for him to endure.  Now, while I miss him so much, I am feeling much better about our decision.

Many Chinese Dog Owners love and take care of their best friends
Many Chinese Dog Owners love and take care of their best friends

TCM (Traditional Chinese Medicine) is huge here and beliefs around what each type of food you eat can do for your body.  Apparently local residents believe that dog meat strengthens the body, especially in summer and ensures good health throughout the winter.  Man’s best friend elsewhere is just another way to prepare for the long winter ahead here.  I get that life in China is rough and that people will try anything to stay healthy but let’s just get these folks some Walgreens with OTC meds readily available and they can go back to enjoying their puppies as pets not meals.

Now, I see dogs everywhere I go in China and while they sometimes have pink hair or are wearing jogging outfits and booties, you don’t see dog meat on the local menus.  A co-worker did admit to having dog “hot pot” with a friend and told me it was considered a delicacy in some places.  He also said it was delicious.  I don’t think I’ve looked at him the same ever since.  Yes, I am judging you.

Animal rights activists have caught wind of the dog meat festival and are protesting.  The paper said that strays are grabbed off the streets and could have diseases.  Oh, so the animal rights activists are concerned with the effect on the people eating the dog and not really advocating for the dog???  Activists are also quoted as saying “the public backlash was damaging the image of Yulin and China.”. You think?  The local government only asked restaurants to take “dog” off the menus and signboards but did not ban the sale and consumption of dog.  So, if you are travelling in Yulin in the near future, as always in China, watch where you eat.  That could be Fido in your Hot Pot.

A Shanghai Midsummer Night’s Dream

First question to Tim Robbins, “How tall are you?”. Answer:  6 foot 5. Yep, folks, he is one tall drank of water.  Even with white flowing hair, he reminds me of his character, “Meat”, from Bull Durham, one of my favorite movies.  These days, Tim has moved on to directing, though when questioned why he changed from being an actor to director, he replied that he first acted at 12 years of age and started directing at 14, so he has been at both for awhile.  These were not deep questions to probe the inner workings of the director but hey, it’s China.  I enjoyed hearing what was on the minds of the Chinese audience after seeing the play.

Magical
Magical

All the actors and their director gathered on the stage after their performance of A Midsummer Night’s Dream in Shanghai. Opening night and it was not sold out. These were Actors’ Gang thespians and they rocked this surreal world of fairies, spells, lovers gone bewitched and crazily complicated language that stayed true to the original story with few exceptions.  To see it in China, the first time that The Actors’ Gang has brought a play to the China mainland was special.

Chinese audiences are still learning how to react to concerts/plays in my experience and true to that, it wasn’t until the end that the audience started responding with some laughter in appropriate places. Having gone to concerts where the audience doesn’t quite know where to clap or respond, the lack of a standing ovation for this wonderful performance didn’t surprise me. When the announcement came that the actors would speak to the audience who wanted to stay after, I was surprised to see how many people ran for the exits. Maybe they didn’t understand but here was a unique opportunity to ask the whole cast direct questions. From my seat in the front row, it felt very intimate and very interesting. Tim was questioned why he chose this Shakespeare play to direct. He said, in this time of turmoil in the world, that this play spoke to love and how fragile yet important it is to all.

I was super proud of myself for going by myself, though I wished Thom was there throughout. It’s always more fun with Thom. Since he is still in Boise setting up our new house, I decided I had to get out of the house and see this great play. After the taxi driver took me on the scenic, more expensive Laowai route, and then got misdirected to buy tickets, I hustled to my seat with minutes to spare. For about $40 US I got a front row seat on the side behind the one man band, which was interesting to watch. I don’t know his name but I’m betting he has done many different musical pursuits in his career. He played the guitar, drums, bells, tambourine, etc. to add drama and flair to the performances.

One Man Band
One Man Band

With Chinese subtitles broadcast on big reader boards, several of the predominantly Chinese audience craned their necks to read what was being said in English but most people just let the performance flow over them, actions taking precedence over words. Even if they could not understand everything that was going on, and really, who can with Shakespeare, everyone enjoyed the dramatic acting and ambience created with simple props.   There was no fancy sets-actually none.  The imagery for this production was created by the creativity of the characters, music, and costumes.  I love Broadway plays and saw many when we lived in NYC but the sets are usually very elaborate and can distract from the actors’ performances.  During this play, I was mesmerized by the ability of the twelve actors to create the mood with branches of trees, flowers and their bodies moving fluidly about the stage.

With dressing lockers on stage at either side, I thought it might detract as the actors raced to change between costumes and characters.  The article in the Shanghai Daily today explained that this set up was a decision by Tim to “strip away the artifice of theater” and it worked.  Tim even told us that he had to add a dream scene to the play because the actors needed to stall for more time to transition costumes.

Dressing rooms on either side of the stage facilitated quick changes for actors
Dressing rooms on either side of the stage facilitated quick changes for actors

Why is it that men in drag always draw a laugh, no matter what language they are speaking? That and crotch grabbing are universal and always appreciated by audience.  Crazy but very predictable.  Well, whatever, it was nice to hear everyone laughing and having a good time.  Many families were there, exposing their children to the great Shakespeare, probably for the first time.

All in all, even though I was Thom-less, I’m glad I ventured out to experience this wonderful production.  I am in awe of the troupe’s amazing ability to transform words into a magical world where love conquers all despite the chaos of the world around us.  Thank you, Tim Robbins.  Well done indeed.

You Looking at Me?

I am one of those people who enjoys eating cereal for dinner…not eyeballs.  Tonight, I had Special K and a banana and loved every bite.  Everyone always ask me if I love the food here in China.  For a “foodie”, China would be paradise.  For a non-foodie like me, it’s challenging.  But not only do I really, really not like eating weird stuff, I get sick so easily.  So, travelling all the time, I am constantly invited to go to business dinners where I get to watch but not eat the food because I know, without a doubt, that if I do try it, I’ll be projectile vomiting into the nearest potted plant like that unfortunate airport incident that haunts me to this day.  So. Not. Pretty.

You looking at me shrimp?
You looking at me shrimp?

Thus, one general rule I embrace is that if the entrée is staring me down, I’ll stare right back at it but no way in Hell is that going into my mouth.  Mmmmm…..eyeball juice.  So at a recent fancy business dinner, I was lucky enough to have not just one course giving me the stink “eye” but several different ones, all attractively presented but all with eyes.  DAMN.  Amazing how those little eyes pop out when boiled..ughhhh!  At a beautiful restaurant with great service, we were offered a “set” menu to choose from with five options.  Since all reflected selections were not my cup of tea, I let my dinner mate pick my menu and I gave him my food when he finished his selections.  I appreciated the smoke emoting from one of the dishes and the bark/coral/flower decorations.  Fancy!  Now slap that on a turkey on whole wheat bread with tomato and mayo and I’m in.

Second course, more eyes
Second course, more eyes

The poor wait staff was so concerned with my lack of embracing their cuisine that, while they had informed me earlier that they only served bottles of wine and not just a glass, they took pity on me and brought me a glass of Cabernet to enjoy.  Bring that lady some alcohol!  Then, maybe, just maybe, she’ll eat our food.  Sorry but no amount of wine gets me eating eyeballs but I appreciated the thought.  So, between everything either having eyes or being raw, I ended up with an all liquid dinner.  My first course was sake followed by a carafe of iced spice punch with a Cabernet chaser.   Not bad but damn I was hungry.  I even sampled the dessert out of desperation but it was hot red beans with taro ice cream-pretty presentation but it tasted like putty.

Sake..punch...Cab=Dinner
Sake..punch…Cab=Dinner

 

Finally, after consuming my lovely liquid trio, I got to leave and try to navigate an unfamiliar subway station to find my way home, all alone, late at night.  Surprisingly, I actually made it home in one piece with no damage and didn’t get lost at all.  First stop at home…enjoying a boring raisin roll and a glass of milk because I was starving.  YUM.  Good Times in Shanghai!